Forgiveness

On this final rendition of our series on dealing with offences, we will be considering the very important ministry of forgiveness in the believer’s life. Before He died, the Lord taught His disciples and said, ‘” Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven”’ (Luke 6:37), and ‘“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”’ (Matthew 6:14-15). Here, the Lord was attempting to paint the important picture of how unforgiveness not only affects the relationships we have with each other as brethren, but how it can it can also affect our relationship with the Father. And as one who is the perfect example for His children, after expressing His complete forgiveness for all the sins of humanity on the cross, the Apostle Paul taught the church to ‘… be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you’ (Ephesians 4:32), exhorting them to ‘bear with one another, forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do’ (Colossians 3:13). Through His sacrifice, Jesus became our example for forgiveness. All the betrayal, mockery, and rejection He endured did not stop Him from laying His life down for humanity (John 10:18) and pleading for their case to the Father (Luke 23:24).

Forgiveness is normally defined as an internal voluntary process undertaken by an individual to release feelings of bitterness, resentment and anger towards another. This is voluntary because it is not always preceded by a show of repentance or an expression of regret from the perpetrator. For example, those who crucified the Lord did not apologise nor did they genuinely see anything wrong with their actions, yet Jesus forgave them all the same. However, to balance this – it is important to understand that forgiveness does not mean pretending an evil did not take place, it does not mean approving of the wrong committed by another and it does not mean making excuses for someone’s bad behaviour. It is not the platform for justifying sin so it appears less sinful and more tolerable, it does not mean overlooking abuse, denying that you have been hurt, or letting people walk all over you. Forgiveness need not even always lead to reconciliation, nor does it necessitate that one expresses to their offender, that they have been forgiven.

At the core, forgiveness is a matter of the heart. It is not defined by what you say or even do, but by the disposition of your heart that cannot be seen. This disposition is important because it has the ability to destroy you and hinder your progress. Unforgiveness is a trap in the spirit, and many believers have caught themselves in snares that have derailed their destinies because they have not released people from their sins – an act that also sets the affected party free by enabling them to move forward instead of living in the bondage of the wounds of yesterday. In Matthew 18:21-25, Peter asked the Lord how many times (on a daily basis), we should forgive those who offend us, the Lord replied saying, ‘“I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven”’ (v. 22) – here the Lord was correcting Peter’s mindset, expressing that there is no cap to forgiveness, we should always be ready and willing to let go of offences. It is hypocritical to continually measure the sins of others, while conveniently forgetting our own. Yes, there might be consequences to the actions of those who offend us, but these are not up to us – vengeance belongs to the Lord (Romans 12:19). Refusing to allow the Lord to have the final say is prideful, as one is essentially exalting their own emotions above the Word of God. Therefore, never allow yourself to beautify unforgiveness and seduce yourself into believing it is ever justified – it is not! We have to learn to be as happy to forgive others, as we are to accept God’s forgiveness.

Lastly, we must always remember ours is a call to walk in love. The Apostle Paul says, ‘Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness…’ (Galatians 6:1).This is the instruction, to heal one another through intentional acts of love, just as the Lord Jesus did with us, that while we were still sinners, He died for us (Romans 5:8). The grace of God is what brought us to repentance and salvation, it was not His wrath. Let us choose to extend the same mercy to one another, because we are never more like Jesus, than when we walk in forgiveness.

Prayer

Father, we thank You for Your unfailing love and bountiful grace, that saved us from the kingdom of darkness where we lived as rebels and as Your enemies. You forgave our trespasses, past present and future, with no full guarantee that we would ever receive Your mercy and accept Your hand of reconciliation. As just men that have been made perfect after Your own image, it is our responsibility to replicate what You have modelled. We choose to walk in forgiveness like our Father! In Jesus’ name. Amen!